How do you truly feel about your body?
If I asked you to go and look in the mirror in your undies, would you do it? And how would you feel?
Do you even have a full-length mirror? Or have you avoided having one in your house for that very reason?
How many diets have you tried?
How many times have you started healthy eating, exercising, starting with the great intentions, only to fall flat on your face, motivation went out the door faster than you could swallow a chocolate chip cookie. Weight kept back on like a chocolate bar creeps into your mouth. And here you are again, and I'm asking you to look in that mirror!
I know the shame I feel looking back on my teen years and seeing just how many chocolate bars I could go through in a day, how I would find myself in a baker’s, coming out with a millionaire’s shortbread...again.
Me and my body. Now there's a thing.
My body has, like so many women, been the bane of so many problems, anxieties, and worries.
I remember coming back home from my first year at Uni (where most weekends were spent with friends going to the pub, coming back for toast or pizza, and more alcohol) and seeing someone I used to work for. the first thing he said was " I see you've put on weight ..." And there started a whole bad relationships with my body. Prior to that I wasn't even aware I had a body. Before Uni I have no recollection of what I thought, good or bad about it. I was even a late starter sexually. But suddenly here I was being told that body had got bigger. At this point I met the father (French), of my children. His model of women, i.e., his mother, was slim, very slim, very conscious of health and weight (as was he of course). For him, women should have flat stomachs. I didn’t... I was endlessly told to hold in my stomach, not to wear certain clothes because "it made my stomach look big", even during sex I was told to hold it in!!!! (See how useless I was at setting boundaries then!). When we were engaged, at one point he told me «If you don't lose weight, I'll break off the engagement". WTF!!! How did I ever stand for this!
Needless to say, it became a complex for me. When we divorced years later, we talked and he realised a lot of things about that, that HE had a problem, not me.
My first relationships after that were an eye opener...Men actually liked CURVES. They saw my stomach as feminine, soft and the bringer of life. I was so taken aback I could have cried, my whole reality turned upside down. That was over15 years ago now, and it has been a HUGE journey for me. I had this image in my head that I was slimmer than I really was (do you have that?), and so when I saw photos of myself I was shocked...the reality didn't meet the image I had in my head. It would spiral me down into self-hatred.
I decided enough was enough. I needed to shift this. And obviously I saw other women were going through the same pain. We all know and are aware of the pressure women have through the media and social views (funny if I had been in the Far east, or Africa, India, my body would have been seen as a great size). We can know and be aware all we want, people can tell us how beautiful our bodies are but until we do the inner work, NOTHING will shift.
We can go on all the diets, healthy regimes we want but until we shift something within us, we will always come back to that set point. And that set point is bound by emotions and negative beliefs.
In 2021, after creating Intuartiv Expression, I decided to test out an idea...build a course with I.E., targeting body image and confidence. The results blew my mind. I followed along doing the course with them. I stood in front of the mirror in my undies and looked. Stomach. Yuk. Flabby, round, an apple. But what was it really showing me? Lack of discipline and control. OH, that hit hard...My late father had been very controlling, highly disciplined, as had the father of my children. I suddenly saw that my stomach as showing me that I had been trying to rebel against this control through my marriage. My ex-husband would make me feel guilty if I ate more than 2 squares of chocolate or have too much cake. Not in an obvious or hurtful way. He had grown up in a very food disciplined way and so he continued to eat that way (albeit very healthily). In moments when he wasn't there I would sneak into the cupboard and have more cake or chocolate...rebelling. I noticed that when I was alone, I felt like a naughty child reaching up for the hidden box of sweets. that was me. I was rebelling against control. And when you, think about it, people who suffer from anorexia (please correct me if I am wrong) tend to be rebelling against overbearing overcontrolling parents. Food is ONE thing that they can control. When we are newborn, we can cry all we want, but it is our parents who control when we eat. They have the food source. They control... People on the course had endless revelations, here's one:
"Each week I have found it easier to let go and just let my gut emotion guide my brush to paint my path of self-discovery and healing.
I have (HAD) a very deep-seated negative belief about myself and my self-worth. I have had many types of counselling over the years, none of which have been able to identify the belief and its root, let alone shift this belief I had about myself, but during this course I have not only identified that belief and where it came from, but I now fully understand and accept that it is not true. It has been a liberation for me, and I can truly say I am a different person because of it. My self-confidence has grown 10-fold in half as many weeks. I am planning on taking this further as helping and healing has always been at the core of my being and now, I feel able to do that, paying forward the wonderful gift I have been given. " Angela Another lady found out why she had such an aversion to orange and realised it went back to an orange swimsuit she wore when she was an overweight child and how she was made to feel ashamed in it. Everyone on the course had HUGE turning points with their relationship to their body, me included. Finally, I am at peace with my body. this is ME. I am happy with my body where it is right now, yes, I am probably 15 kilos over what I would like to be. But I know longer hate my body. My husband today loves my body and accepts ME as I am. My body is the vessel to which my soul can do its work. It isn't by chance we are saying, "emotional eating", but it's SO much deeper than that. In Emotion Code there is something called a heart wall that can be released, an energetic wall around the heart that protects us against further pain. Well, you know that you can also have a body wall and a fat wall? And those have been created by the subconscious to protect ourselves from the outside world. " After a session with Nicky I no longer have cravings!!! I also noticed that my clothes started fitting a bit tight and I had cravings for high calorie foods. I haven't had potato chips in months now (which are like my drug of choice) No desire, even if they are in front of me. " Evelina
You cannot help someone you hate. Go on, think of someone you really DON'T like, and imagine trying to help them, can you feel that resistance? Now imagine trying to help a body you hate! That resistance will be there. In order for your regime to work you need to address the emotions. and that's the same for illness, such as Diabetes, (which is all about not having the sweetness in life when you were young) allergies (resistance), food intolerances, you HAVE to look at the emotions and these emotions can be from this life, a past life or inherited down the generations. All those past generations that went through famines, war, food restrictions and rationing, concentration camps... those emotions around food stay within the energy body and become attached to the genes, transferring down the generations. I've had clients who had past lives in war zones, starvation and the emotions show up in this life around food Shifting those emotions whether that's through Emotion Code or through Intuartiv Expression has profound effects not only on your eating habits but also how you regard your body and how you take care of it.
This is why I have integrated the body image course into a 3 month one to one program jsut for you, combining Emotion Code, Intuartiv expression, essential oils and coaching, so that you accpet where you are right now and love it. Create a trampoline from where you can jump to the enxt level. You need to start and accept where you are right now, and only then can you take the next steps forward. You can also simply take out an emotion Code subscription, allowing you a monthly Emotion Code session which will help you target all those emotions that come up around food and eating, either alone or as a complement for your current health regime.
Tempted? Hop over here to find out more.
Your journey needs a staring point, and that point is NOW.